Pruett's Blog: The Booker T Guide to Half-Assed Commentary

By Will Pruett

Wednesday, May 25 – 7:00 P.M. (CT)

So, you've decided that you want to do commentary for WWE? Nice work! I'm sure you have a ton of experience and a nice reel of yourself lending your voice to inspired matches, however you need not send those things in. The following guide will tell you all you need to know about commentary.

1. Make sure you know the name of the show you're calling. More than knowing story lines, the name of the show can inform your call of said show in many ways. As an example, you can always say "This is what [name of show] is all about." in a heated moment. It lends credibility to the constantly changing title of the show, plus you just have to read a sign instead of learning things like wrestler's names.

2. If you have something to say, do not simply say it. Begin your statement by prefacing with exactly what you are going to do. Basically, preface half of your sentences with "Let me tell you something about..." It will let the people listening know to listen now, since you are indeed about to tell them something.

3. Don't bother figuring out the differences between heels and babyfaces. Sure, you are there to get characters over, but just judge their actions as you see fit at the time. It is okay to encourage a heel's vicious behavior in one moment and then later on in the same show blast another heel for doing the same thing.

4. Speaking of not getting characters over, it is always okay to trash the work ethic of a babyface wrestler. The hardworking babyface image is so 1985. Now we want to cheer for a wrestler who "switches it into cruise control" for the first half of a match.

5. Clichés are clichés for a reason. Use them liberally.

6. Pretty moves from wrestlers can be compared to dance moves. Sin Cara may not have a hard hitting move set, and you'll never get yourself over if you don't point it out. Go ahead and say he looks like he is doing ballet or jazzercise.

7. Like all WWE commentators, never bother to learn what the word "personified" means.

8. Don't bother to actually time matches, but reference the time as often as possible. You'll gain credibility by almost doubling match times in your speech.

9. In the end, there is one golden rule to be taken from all of WWE's commentary from the last year, getting yourself over matters far more than getting the product over.

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