By Chris Shore

WWE Smackdown on SyFy
Taped on 3/13 in Columbus, Ohio

[Q1] The opening video aired, followed by the pyro, and Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, and Booker T welcomed us to Smackdown. Christian was introduced, and he made his entrance to a huge pop. The ring was setup for the Peep Show. Christian put over the 12 man tag match at WrestleMania 28 and introduced John Laurinaitis and David Otunga.

Johnny Ace welcomed Christian back and Christian put him over. He said his next guest had no honor, and introduced Teddy Long and Aksana. Christian said he was going to put his feelings aside and give both men a chance to convince him to be on their team. He told Teddy to go first.

Teddy looked him up and down and said nothing. Christian asked him why he was just looking at him. He said he was a two-time champion and whatever team he was on would be the winner. He told Teddy to give him what he deserved. He did his one more match gimmick line and Teddy said Christian already got what he deserved. He said he respected Christian's accomplishments, but he was not going to get on his knees and beg him to join his team. He said once his team won, nobody would get a title match unless they earned it, and nobody who annoyed or disrespected him would get a shot at all.

Ace cut him off and said Teddy didn't know anything about respect. He said if Christian was on his team, he would give him his one more match after they won. Christian accepted the offer and joined Team Johnny. They hugged, his music played, and Otunga pulled out a Christian t-shirt that Ace held up like it was a draft or contract signing. Hilarious. Teddy tried to book Christian in a match, but Ace said he wasn't medically cleared. Teddy said that Otunga, who was in street clothes, had to face the newest member of Team Teddy, Kofi Kingston. Kofi and Santino made their entrance...[C]

Shore's Slant: Fun opening segment. I hate the storyline, but the mic work here was well done.

[Q2] 1. Kofi Kingston (w/Santino Marella, Teddy Long, and Aksana) defeated David Otunga (w/John Laurinaitis and Christian) in 5:00 of TV time. The match was joined in progress with Otunga kicking Kofi in the corner. Teddy and Ace sat in on commentary because a three man booth isn't too many voices already. Kofi came back with kicks and strikes of his own, but Otunga hit a powerslam. Otunga whipped Kofi to the corner and Kofi shorted a springboard crossbody that almost killed Otunga.

Kofi hit the ropes for the Boom Drop, but Christian grabbed his foot. The ref asked Christian if he did it and Teddy told the ref yes. The ref tossed Christian from the ring area. Teddy and Christian argued, and then Teddy and Ace argued, which distracted the ref. Otunga took his belt off to hit Christian, but Santino stopped him. Otunga hit Santino, but turned into a Trouble in Paradise for a Kingston win...

Backstage, Daniel Bryan walked up to the door of the Diva's locker room. AJ came out in a little black dress and I'm not entirely sure what happened next because I stroked out, er, I mean, she said the dress didn't fit right and he said it looked better on the mannequin. He said they were the next power couple like Savage and Elizabeth, Hunter and Steph, Brad and Angelina. He said he was the champ, and she should be one too, so he pulled some strings and got her a match that could lead to a title match. He said he would be in her corner, like in life. They kissed, she went to get ready, and he wiped the kiss off...[C]

Shore's Slant: That match was an overbooked mess. Ugh. AJ looked great, but that "it looked better on the mannequin" line is a dirty insult. I know. I made that mistake once too. I still have the scars.

2. AJ (w/Daniel Bryan) defeated Nikki Bella (w/Brie Bella) at 2:27. Bryan made a separate entrance and AJ played the Miss Elizabeth role perfectly. Brie got on her knees to punk AJ, so AJ hit a nice dropkick. Brie came back and slammed Brie around as Bryan cheered her on.

[Q3] AJ started her comeback and the Bellas tried twin magic. Bryan yelled at the ref and stopped it, but Nikki came over and argued with Bryan to distract the ref. Brie dropped AJ from behind. Nikki tried to lift AJ for something, but AJ slipped out and hooked a roll up for the win. Bryan celebrated like he ad won something and then lectured AJ up the ramp...The Rock concert was hyped for next...[C]

Shore's Slant: AJ sold well, but was sloppy on offense during her comeback. Still, I love this story. They're making Bryan look like a total asshole, and AJ is getting some character. That will only help her in the Divas division once this story is over.

The Raw Rebound recapped the Rock concert and a little of the Cena rap, and then the announce team put over the Rock concert on iTunes...Backstage, Matt Striker asked Cody Rhodes about making fun of Big Show. Cody put over Big Show as a "destroyer" 364 days a year, but on WrestleMania day, he's a choke artist. He pointed out that Show has never won a single's match at Mania. Cody repeated the question of how he would win and answered with, "Just watch." Striker said he would face the Great Khali next...[C]

Shore's Slant: I've said all I'm going to say about the Rock concert on member's exclusive audio. So sign up now at the Dot Net Member's Signup page if you want to hear my thoughts.

[Q4] 3. Cody Rhodes defeated Great Khali at 3:13. Khali powered Cody around to start, but Cody hit a dropkick to the knee and then hit an arm breaker. He locked in an arm bar that Khali just clubbed out of. Cody worked the leg next. Khali kicked him away to the corner, so Cody climbed to the top. Khali chopped him out of the air. He went for the big head chop, but Cody ducked under the ropes and hit a hangman. He followed with a missile dropkick to the knee, and then the beautiful disaster kick on a kneeling Khali for the win...Randy Orton was shown walking backstage...[C]

Shore's Slant: Wow, that beautiful disaster kick got deadly all of a sudden. Remember when that was a setup? Still, good win for Cody going into Mania.

Randy Orton made his ring entrance and said, "My name is Alberto Del Rio!" No. He said, "My name is Randy Orton, and usually when I have a problem with someone I don't come out here and talk about it." He said usually he is the hunter, but recently he's been hunted by Kane. He said he wanted to know why Kane picked him. He said he wasn't John Cena, he embraced hate, and hate embraced him.

[Q5] He said he was calling Kane out because when he had to put him down, he wanted to know why he had to do it. Kane's pyro popped and he walked out onto the stage with a mic. He said Orton was demanding an explanation. He asked Orton if it made him uncomfortable being in the unknown. He said normally he would enjoy watching Orton twist in the wind, but since Orton asked so nicely, he would give him the answer. He said apparently Orton had forgotten, but he obsessed about it.

Kane played a video of his street fight with Orton from last July. It finished with Kane shaking Orton's hand. Kane said he watches that video every single day to remind him what he had become. He said the person who shook Orton's hand was gone, all that was there was the monster he should have always been. Kane said the WWE was too big for both of them. He said he needed closure, and he wouldn't be whole again until he had completely decimated him.

Orton said thank you, that was very enlightening. Then he told Kane to shut up and come to the ring and see if he could finish what he started. Kane started to the ring, and then stopped. He said destroying Orton now wouldn't be enough, he wanted to do it at WrestleMania. Orton nodded and Kane popped his pyro...[C]

Shore's Slant: Well, they got there. It's a weak storyline, but it's a t least a storyline. I expect this one to end up with some sort of stipulation before its all said and done.

[Q6] Drew McIntyre made his ring entrance. A video recapped his beating Hornswoggle last week. Teddy long appeared on the screen and said he heard Drew signed a one year, no-cut contract last week and that was fine with him. He said that meant he could book this match. Big Show's music hit...

4. Big Show squashed Drew McIntyre at 1:49. Drew started quick and went for the Future Shock, but Show hit his spear, choke slam, and WMD. The ref stopped the match because Drew was out...[C]

Shore's Slant: Zzzzzzzz. This show is dragging bad tonight. As is often the case, nothing is bad, just not exciting. That match was extremely boring and predictable.

6. Mark Henry squashed Yoshi Tatsu at 1:36. Mark Henry made his entrance as soon as the show came back. Tatsu was already in the ring. Gee, I wonder how this is going to go? Tatsu hit a couple of kicks to start, but Henry won with the world's strongest slam...

A video showed Zack Ryder asking for Teddy to put him on his team from his Z! True Long Island Story...Chris Jericho was shown backstage...[C]

Shore's Slant: Back to back squashes? Kill me please.

[Q7] Chris Jericho made his entrance and said even though he was getting hate Tweets, he was not going to apologize. He said people have accused him of going over the line, but you can't go over the line in this business. He called Punk a fraud, and hid his pain behind tattoos and Xs on his hands. He said every time he unleashes a "pipe bomb" it's really for his parents.

He said he was the best in the world at everything he does and Punk is jealous. He said he would prove that on April 1 when he walks out as the new WWE Champion. He said at the after party, he's going to fix himself a stiff cocktail and take a big drink while making a toast to himself and CM Punk and his pathetic father. He told the fans to chant one last time for their anti-hero and led them in a CM Punk chant that he switched to "CM Drunk." He said, "Pipe bomb" and dropped the mic...[C]

Shore's Slant: Decent promo from Jericho. I'm not a big fan of the story. Of course my Blue Devils just got beat by a 15 seed so maybe I'm just pissed off too.

5. Chris Jericho defeated Sheamus by countout at 15:20. Sheamus shoved Jericho out of the lock up and powered Jericho around. Jericho went to the floor and Sheamus gave chase. Jericho slid back in, and Sheamus hit a slingshot shoulder tackle. Sheamus whipped Jericho over the top rope and followed, but Jericho drove him into the rail. Daniel Bryan and AJ made their way out...

[Q8][C] Back at 6:57. Jericho hit a slingshot hangman and choked him on the ropes. Bryan sat in a chair near the announce table with AJ standing behind him. Jericho went for a bulldog, but Sheamus shoved him into the turnbuckle. Both men sold. Sheamus recovered first and hit the Irish Curse back breaker.

Jericho hit a thumb to the eye as the ref tried to separate them. He went for the Codebreaker, but Sheamus shoved him away. Sheamus went for the Brogue kick, but Jericho moved and Sheamus hung his foot on the top rope. Jericho hit the springboard dropkick and Lionsault for a near fall.

They fought on the top rope, and Jericho was knocked down. Sheamus dropped down and hit a running clothesline for two. Sheamus tried for the Celtic Cross, but Jericho grabbed the legs and reversed into the Walls of Jericho. Jericho fell in the hold and Sheamus made the ropes. Sheamus tried for the Celtic Cross again, but Jericho slipped out, so Sheamus clotheslined him over the top.

Sheamus followed to the floor and tossed Jericho at Bryan and Aj, who made it out of the way in time. He rolled Jericho back in the ring and stared at Bryan from the apron. Jericho knocked him to the floor and Sheamus hit the table, The ref dragged Jericho back, so Bryan hit a drop kick on Sheamus. Sheamus wasn't able to answer the count after than, so Jericho won. Post-match, Sheamus chased Bryan, but Bryan ran to the stage, so Sheamus hit a Brogue kick on Jericho to close the show...

Shore's Slant: Fun match with an expected shitty ending. I'm OK with it as Sheamus needed to show some ass for Bryan, and Jericho doesn't need to show any more, but Sheamus vs. Jericho with no build is weak booking. Especially when you consider it's the first time. I will never understand why WWE burns through matches like this. I'll have more to say tomorrow on the hitlist and All Access audio. Thanks for watching along with me tonight.

Questions? Comments? Anyone, anyone? Let me hear from you. Email me at css3238@gmail.com or tweet me @TheShoreSlant with whatever is on your mind.

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