WWE TV Reports 5/16 Twilling's WWE Smackdown Coverage: Undertaker vs. La Familia (including Vickie Guerrero), two divas matches, barely any PPV hype By Rich Twilling May 17, 2008 - 11:00 PM Email This Article | Printer Friendly Page Send Us News & Results | Back to Main Listing WWE Smackdown on The CW Network Taped May 13 in Grand Rapids, MI [Q1] A video aired of Vickie Guerrero saying she did not want to strip The Undertaker of the World Heavyweight Championship. The Championship Chase was recapped, resulting in a match for the vacant title at Judgment Day between The Undertaker and Edge… The opening video aired with no fireworks to follow. Instead, Edge and La Familia headed to the ring. Tony Chimmel announced him as the next World Heavyweight Champion… Michael Cole and Mick Foley welcomed us to the show. Foley called the Championship Chase a farce. Cole wondered what Taker would do since he could not use the chokehold. Foley said he was fine for twenty years without it… Edge called his “recovery” a medical miracle. He said Taker could not beat him unless he used the illegal move. Teddy Long’s music hit and the crowd popped huge. Just kidding. Vickie looked disgusted. Long apologized for being late, but he went to a Board of Directors meeting in Stamford because Vickie blew them off. He read a prepared statement saying they were not happy with Vickie’s decisions regarding Edge. They said Vickie would have to wrestle tonight or give resign her position as General Manager. Vickie fired Teddy. Teddy said she could not fire him because he quit. He left to his music and mentioned one more thing; Vickie would face The Undertaker tonight… [C] Twill’s Two Cents: Please resign! Please! I am not sure how long that segment went, but however long it was, I will never get that time back. That was horrible. [Q2] 1. C.M. Punk defeated Chuck Palumbo in 5:44. They showed highlights of the post match brawl between these two a few weeks back, where Chuck laid Punk out. Palumbo was very physical early, complete with a headlock takeover. Punk punched wildly, but Chuck overpowered him with a big closeline. Punk hit an ensiguiri and Palumbo went out of his way to end up in the corner, allowing Punk to hit the high knee/bulldog combination. Chuck came back with a short closeline. He went for the full throttle, but Punk reversed it into a GTS for the win… After the match, Punk clutched his briefcase. Foley said, “he literally holds the future in his hands.” Actually, you cannot literally hold the future… Twill’s Two Cents: This match seemed off to me. It was very awkward in spots. I already have a jaded attitude about this show, but this match just was not as good as it could have been. At least we know a C.M. Punk match will never have an obvious winner. Backstage, MVP went into Vickie and Edge’s office. He was pissed about last week’s charade. Finlay came in and said something about getting some green tea for Hornswoggle. Show came in and mocked Vickie having to face Taker tonight. Vickie made a Show and Finlay vs. MVP and his choice of partner match. Chavo, who was in the tournament too, was also upset… [C] Twill’s Two Cents: Why are they upset? They did not win anyway. [Q3] 2. Michelle McCool defeated Layla in 2:08. Foley was being especially silly. He recited a Bruce Springsteen song for Michelle. Michelle worked over Layla’s leg. She held onto the leg and flipped over, applying a heel hook in the process. Layla tapped out. Cole plugged Batista reacting to Shawn Michaels after the commercial… [C] Twill’s Two Cents: The women’s match was unspectacular. Michelle working over the leg was cool though, as was Layla tripping on the apron during her ring entrance. Back from commercial, they plugged the children’s magazine being aimed at five to seven year olds, but showed pictures of various celebrity WWE fans, like Kevin Federline and Snoop Dogg. Yes, they are kid friendly… Batista came to the ring. Cole talked forever about Batista’s love for the World Heavyweight Championship, but made no mention of Shawn Michaels. Batista introduced the Raw footage of Michaels admitting his faking of the knee injury. He said Michaels would be at Judgment Day and since he had nothing to do, he might be there too. Twill’s Two Cents: People always say Batista’s promos are better when he keeps them short. Well, he kept this one short and it still sucked. If you lied to Batista and he threatened to hurt you if he found out you were lying, you should be concerned. The only people this promo concerned were those fans hoping for an interesting segment. Foley did a live read plugging Taker vs. Vickie. He yelled, “TONIGHT” almost humorously… [C] [Q4] 3. Big Show and Finlay (with Hornswoggle) defeated Mark Henry and MVP in 9:55. Hornswoggle went under the ring. When MVP came out, he looked completely stoned. His eyes were glazed over. Finlay and MVP picked up where they left off, with physical mat work. Show tagged in and MVP stood his ground, for one punch, before tagging Henry. There was a battle of power between the two, which was even until Show grounded Henry with a shoulderblock. Finlay came in and took the long heel beatdown. [Q5] Show took the hot tag and disposed of MVP. Henry blindsided him in the corner. He then charged at Finlay, but Finlay pulled the top rope down and Henry crashed to the floor. MVP went for the running kick on Show, but was met with a chokeslam instead. Show scored the clean win… After the match, Foley said he wanted to see Show vs. Henry one on one… Backstage, Vickie addressed the fans. She called herself a role model and pioneer. She said she could not cancel the match, but she could change it. She made it a six on one match with La Familia vs. Taker… [C] Twill’s Two Cents: I figured they would have gone with Show vs. Henry at the PPV. I guess a feud no one cares about gets the slow build. As for Vickie, if young girls all over the world want to butcher the English language, then yes, she is a role model. The whole General Manager thing is ridiculous. The Board of Directors are making her wrestle, but she is able to change the match? That makes sense. An advertisement for Judgment Day aired… 4. Vladimir Kozlov defeated Funaki in 2:33. The crowd chanted “USA.” Surprisingly, there were no “Japan” chants. This match was very slow with Kozlov holding onto a long rest hold. He eventually hit the reverse DDT for the win. The best part of this was Foley humming theme music for Kozlov after the match… Twill’s Two Cents: They could run an old feed of any Vladimir Kozlov match and it would be the same as one of his current matches. They plugged tonight’s riveting main event… [C] [Q6] They showed a recap video of Deuce and Domino replacing Cherry with Maryse. Cherry slapped Maryse and she responded with the worst acting display in the history of the cinematic arts… 5. Cherry defeated Maryse (with Deuce and Domino) in 2:15. To her credit, Maryse tried to work a little bit. Cole asked Foley why Cherry wanted her revenge. Foley said, “it was like when Rocky fought Creed because Adrian was dating Paulie.” Anyway, Cherry hit a bulldog for the win. After the match, Cherry retreated up the ramp as Deuce stared at her with a look of love, shock, admiration, or something. Twill’s Two Cents: I could never overlook a Rocky reference. I have perhaps an unhealthy love of those movies. FYI, Talia Shire (Adrian) dated Burt Young (Paulie) in real life. I guess someone was watching TNA, but it makes no sense to put two women’s matches on a show with no women’s championship. They plugged the main event once again. I love old fashioned six on one matches… [C] Cole and Foley began the Judgment Day card rundown. However, they swerved us by showing a ridiculously long video package featuring Triple H vs. Randy Orton… [Q7] After the longest recap video in history, they went ahead and plugged the PPV. Good thing because this show is not doing much in that area… Backstage, Kofi Kingston was praising Matt Hardy as Eve stood by and eyef*cked him. Shelton Benjamin, borrowing HBK’s woman’s tanktop, came up and tried to punk Hardy. Hardy said something about his hair. I did not catch it all; I guess having two terrible promo guys in a backstage segment will do that to you… [C] 6. Matt Hardy defeated Shelton Benjamin in 6:32. Both guys worked hard here, but the match was just there; there was not anything special to it. The focus here was Cole and Foley talking about how great an athlete Benjamin was, but why he was not a bigger star. Foley said Shelton was missing the “it” factor. Twill’s Two Cents: In this case, “It” is personality and charisma. Cole said Shelton was looking for championship reigns. He said it took Hardy a decade to win his first single’s title. Finish came when Benjamin hit a spinning heel kick. Hardy went to the top but Shelton kicked him on the way down. All of a sudden, Hardy hit the surprise Twist of Fate for the win… Twill’s Two Cents: Like I said, both guys came to work but nothing really stood out. After the match, Foley, who was wearing my ex-girlfriend’s cheetah print bath towel, talked about the main event and how he thought it was wrong to make Vickie wrestle tonight… [Q8] They aired the events that led to the main event as if they happened weeks ago. The video was already produced, not just a “highlight” video… [C] 7. The Undertaker vs. Edge, Curt Hawkins, Zach Ryder, and Vickie Guerrero ended in a no contest. My DVR cut off here but I saw Chavo and Bam Neely retreat to the back, taking themselves out of the match. I read Chris Shore’s report, and he said he crapped himself. That says it all right there. Looked like the typical stuff of Taker trying to get to Vickie but getting cut off at every turn… Twill’s Two Cents: Is there not a PPV on Sunday? Did they do anything to build up to it? Vickie Guerrero isn’t exactly Bill Alfonso, where we really care about her getting her ass kicked. She just needs to get off of TV. As for the show, it sucked. I had to watch it on DVR because the Giants screwed up the entire TV schedule, and it still took forever to watch. I tried to be open-minded, even after the horrible opening segment, but this show just plain sucked. Next week, we should be back on schedule, assuming my CW network affiliate doesn’t bait and switch me with their scheduling like they did this week. Remember west coasters, you are free to watch the show and follow along on the site as I provide ongoing coverage. What did you think of this show? If you still remember it, send me your feedback. You can reach me by writing to dotnetrich@gmail.com. BOOKMARK DOT NET AND ADD US TO YOUR RSS • HELP DOT NET: TAKE OUR ADVERTISER DEMO SURVEY CLICK TO RETURN TO MAIN LISTING OR SELECT A LINK BELOW FROM THIS CATEGORY WWE TV Reports Latest Twelve Articles 8/19 Twilling's ECW Live Coverage: Mark Henry defends the ECW Title against Matt Hardy, new superstar debuts 8/18 Twilling's WWE Raw Live Coverage: C.M. Punk wrestles in his hometown, what is next for Batista and Cena? SummerSlam fallout 8/18 Powell's WWE Raw Live Coverage: C.M. 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