By Rich Twilling

WWE NXT on WWE.com
Taped earlier tonight in Topeka, Kansas

[Q1] The opening video aired and Michael Cole welcomed us to the show. He said over ninety countries were watching the show. Ninety countries, just over one hundred people, but who is counting.

Matt Striker brought out the rookies and said tonight would be the first elimination. He set up the first competition of the night, which is a mechanical bull riding competition. The Bella Twins demonstrated...

Twill's Two Cents: They have had plenty of practice with all of the Raw guest hosts.

Naomi really enjoyed her ride. She set the pace at 12.5 seconds. Aksana beat that time with 17.9 seconds. A.J. and Kaitlyn did some fruity patty cake thing before A.J. took her turn. She also put on a Kurt Angle mini cowboy hat. She fell off fast.

Jamie must have raided Maryse's hair extension bag. She didn't do very well. Maxine was next. She likes being on top. She sucked pretty badly. Kaitlyn was next and she wore the same outfit again. Somebody give her a gift certificate to Old Navy.

Aksana won the competition. She will face Maxine next. I'm sure everyone is waiting with baited breath for that... [C]

Twill's Two Cents: Just like a soda can up the ass, this is NXT!

Goldust was in the ring with Aksana. He had the Million Dollar Belt with him. They keep calling it a championship, so WWE now has another championship to ignore...

1. Aksana (with Goldust) defeated Maxine (with Alicia Fox) in Aksana tried what looked to be a snapmare, but something went wrong and Maxine was lucky to not have a broken neck.

[Q2] Maxine hit a move and went for a cover, but Aksana reversed it and scored the pinfall. Goldust and Aksana celebrated together after the match. Just saw the replay. Worst small package ever. That's what she said...

Twill's Two Cents: Instant classic. No, not really. Seriously though, I hope Maxine wasn't hurt.

Footage was shown of John Cena joining The Nexus. It was the hardest thing he has ever done. I'm sure the NXT rookie divas cannot remember the hardest thing they've ever done...

Twill's Two Cents: Everybody have fun tonight; everybody Wang Chung tonight.

Cena saved Wade Barrett from elimination in last night's battle royal and then eliminated himself. There was more drama put into this video footage than in all of 'Legendary.' I never noticed before, but when Barrett opens his mouth, he roars like a lion...

Kaitlyn vs. Vickie Guerrero was hyped, as was a rookie talent competition. A.J.'s talent should be jumping up and down... [C]

Aksana's talent is pushups. Um, well, she folded her legs over her arms and did a set. She wins. Cole said he was texting. The black girl rapped. She actually wasn't that bad. She has brains and booty. Just ask her. She is already better than R-Truth.

A.J. said her talent was going to be giving Michael Cole a personality. Actually, she went with flexibility. She folded and bended herself up. "I could do that," said Cole. Nice. It was pretty impressive.

Jamie's talent was "turning men on." I guess "being hot" is not a prerequisite for that. She kissed Matt Striker. He jizzed in his pants. Kaitlyn had a freaking easel in the ring. She drew. Porn music played. She "drew" Vickie Guerrero with fart lines coming out of her ass.

She then cut a promo saying she put Vickie on one canvas and was looking forward to putting her on another one. Maxine wanted to apologize to Hornswoggle for last week. She baked him a pie. Horny came out to the ring. Pie sounds good.

[Q3] Horny hugged A.J. but didn't want to go near "man pleasing" Jamie. Maxine put a little cream in Horny's face, but he turned it around and threw the entire pie in her face. Kaitlyn won by far and Vickie just said, "Whatever."

Kaitlyn and A.J. have now both won three competitions, but only one of them gets immunity, and the audience gave it to Kaitlyn. What the hell? They both won the most, so they should both be immune...

Twill's Two Cents: Now WWE NXT has done the "pie in the face" gag. What's next? One of the rookies giving birth to a hand?

The Make-A-Wish commercial aired. Again, awesome stuff...

Kaitlyn vs. Vickie was hyped. Apparently, it is "dividing the WWE locker room." Yes, I'm sure the locker room gives a flying f---... [C]

A United States Immigration guy, who didn't seem legal himself, served Aksana with some papers. He even called her a Russian Trish Stratus. Goldust offered up a threesome between him, her, and the belt. He said they would take care of it...

The riveting, heart pounding history between Vickie Guerrero and Kaitlyn was chronicled...

Vickie and Dolph Ziggler made their entrance. Vickie wore perhaps the scariest wrestling gear ever... [C]

[Q4] 2. Kaitlyn defeated Vickie Guerrero (with Dolph Ziggler) in 5:01. Vickie did toe touches. Ziggler tried not to look at her ass. Drop toe hold by Kaitlyn. Vickie complained she was bleeding...

Twill's Two Cents: Stop the match!

They exchanged slaps. Not little girly ones either. Vickie pulled Kaitlyn to the floor. She then went to work on her in the ring. By the way, nice look for Ziggler wearing a suit with the Intercontinental Championship around his waist.

Kaitlyn hit a bodyslam for a one count. Vickie screamed at Ziggler for not helping her. Kaitlyn the school girled Vickie for the win. Afterward, she hugged Ziggler pretty sluttily. Vickie screamed and left the ring... [C]

Elimination time! Striker stood with the rookies on the floor. Kaitlyn earned immunity. No Pro's Poll. They went straight to the elimination. Jamie was the first one eliminated. Jamie thanked the fans and The Bella Twins. She wished every rookie the best of luck...

Twill's Two Cents: Classy speech by Jamie, who really came across as a genuinely nice person throughout the competition. She did some ring announcing during season two of NXT, so we'll see if WWE has a place for her moving forward from here.

Thank you for following along with me this week for the first show on WWE.com. We like to have our fun on Tuesday nights, but tonight's broadcast was definitely one of the best of season three thus far. See you next week.

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