TNA Impact on Spike TV
Taped in Orlando, Fla.

[Q1] A video focussed on the Hulk Hogan signing, his announcement of the live Impact, Sting no-showing the interview, Mick Foley and Jeff Jarrett, and the Desmond Wolfe vs. Kurt Angle feud... The show is called "Foley/Jarrett Summit"...

A shot aired of Mick Foley arriving at his office with Jeremy Borash following along. Foley entered the room and found Kevin Nash sitting in his chair. Nash said he arranged a sitdown meeting tomorrow between Foley and Hogan. Nash said Hogan wasn't thrilled about it, but he's doing it.

Nash held up a book labeled "rulebook" and said he'd been doing some reading. He said he wanted to host the show while Foley was away meeting Hogan. Foley gave a disc containing footage of his meeting with Jarrett to Nash and told him to make sure the production truck gets it. Foley invited Borash with him to the Hogan meeting. They left the room and then Nash made a phone call requesting security tapes from Foley's office for the last three months...

The opening video aired... Mike Tenay and Taz introduced the show and hyped the Foley/Jarrett summit video. Tenay also hyped that Nash is "large and in charge." Ugh...

Kevin Nash and Eric Young came to the ring as Tenay questioned how impartial Nash could be as the special guest host. Nash informed the crowd that he's in complete control of Impact. "I get to make the matches and I get to run the festivities," Nash said. He told the crowd that Foley was on his way to the airport for his meeting with Hulk.

Nash announced that the matches for the evening would feature all three members of the British Invasion vs. Chris Sabin in a handicap match, Scott Steiner and a TNA Knockout of his choice vs. Bobby Lashley and Kristal Lashley, Eric Young vs. Hamada for the TNA Global Title, Tara vs. ODB in a trailer park throwdown with street fight rules after both women "guzzle" a six-pack of beer.

He also booked Team 3D, Rhino, and Jesse Neal vs. Matt Morgan, Hernandez, The Pope, and Suicide. He said the loser of the match will have to start their match at the pay-per-view alone for five minutes. He also booked Lacey Von Erich vs. Velvet Sky in a mud wrestling match. They showed the mud pit on the floor. Nash also announced that the person who bid the most money would get a title match against A.J. Styles.

Powell's POV: Tenay said the matches had Nash's fingerprints all over them. He also said it would be like a car crash in that he wouldn't be able to take his eyes off of them. Using the special Powell decoder ring I can tell you that Tenay's comments really mean that Vince Russo's fingerprints are all over the show and it's more Crash TV bullshit because the guy hasn't had an original idea in years.

A shot aired of Mick Foley in the TNA office. He saw a video with Dixie Carter talking. He mocked her for not returning his calls. He entered a room and found Vince Russo and Ed Ferrara. He complained to them about Dixie not returning his calls and asked them to write him a vignette where she returns his calls. He bumped into production crew member David Sahadi and asked him where Jarrett hangs out. Sahadi told him hasn't talked to Jarrett in months and gave him a possible location where he might hang out... [C]

Powell's POV: Foley asking the TNA writers to write him a vignette? Ugh. Wow, they're so insider. Ugh. Honestly, I'm just happy Ferrara ditched the dreadlocks.

[Q2] The announcers pushed the live show for January 4. They also teased additional footage of Foley attempting to meet Jarrett...

Powell's POV: The beauty of recording something in advance is that you can edit out the shit and not waste people's times with the useless footage. Apparently, that doesn't happen in TNA's storyline world because they're acting as if they are just airing the footage unedited.

1. Chris Sabin beat Brutus Magnus, Doug Williams, and Rob Terry in 3:25. Tenay said there was a graphic incident involving Abyss. He said they were waiting for Spike TV to give them permission to air the footage.

The fans chanted "You can't wrestle" at Terry. Sabin used his speed to elude the Invasion and made them look like idiots. In the end, Sabin double dropkicked the two main members and then rolled up the ultra-jacked Terry for the pin. Afterward, Brutus and Doug yelled at Terry and blamed him for the loss...

Backstage, Christy Hemme, who was filling in for Borash, interviewed Scott Steiner about the rest of the Main Event Mafia splitting up. Steiner took offense. He said he'd find a freak to join him against the the Lashleys. He unveiled t-shirt with Kristal's image on it and said it's not the first time she's been on his chest... [C]

[Q3] Foley entered a diner and asked a woman named Ruby if she had seen Jarrett. She said she hadn't seen him in over a month. Foley asked her to let him know if she sees Jarrett or has any idea where he is...

Powell's POV: Let me guess, this is some diner where the TNA crew goes to eat, so they think they're being cute by having Foley conduct an interview there. The problem is that it's not in any way compelling for viewers watching at home.

2. Scott Steiner and Awesome Kong defeated Bobby Lashley and Kristal Lashley in a mixed tag match in 3:50. Lashley got a nice reaction from the females in attendance. Kong accidentally clotheslined Steiner, which led to some bickering. Later, Kong slammed Kristal. Kong went to the top rope, but Steiner covered Kristal in the missionary position as the ref counted to three. Afterward, Steiner did pushups on top of Kristal...

Powell's POV: I'm sure that will offend plenty of viewers. I'm not bothered by it, but I don't have kids watching the show with me. Of course, TNA's defense is that they don't claim to be a PG product.

Backstage, Lauren interviewed Samoa Joe, who said he was sent home for two weeks after main eventing the pay-per-view. He bitched about being left out of the "random drawing" for the Thanksgiving tournament. Joe said someone doesn't want him to get the TNA Title. He said he entered the Feast or Fired match to get a shot at the title. Beer Money entered the picture and said this was their chance to get a shot at the TNA Tag Titles. After Joe left, the two Beer Money members acknowledged that the possibility that one of them could be fired... [C]

Powell's POV: Nice to hear Joe had an explanation for being off television. This is the first real hype for the Feast or Fired match. I'm not a fan of the match, but they do need to establish it over the next couple weeks if they want people to take it seriously. The cut-in showed the production members adding mud to the mud pit.

[Q4] Backstage, Madison Rain, Velvet Sky, and Lacey Von Erich bitched about the mud match. Nash entered the room and told them it was all about ratings. He said no one would turn the channel while they fought. He said that with ratings comes money. Nash said they needed a referee, so he brought a skimpy referee outfit for Madison. The Beautiful People were sold on the idea of making more money if the ratings go up. After Nash left, Lacey said they were going to get rated like a five-star hotel, only they'll get six because they're so hot...

Another video focussed on Hulk Hogan, Dixie Carter, and Sting. The announcers pondered whether Sting would return to television...

Powell's POV: Check the compound. Don't ask.

Another video featured Hulk Hogan being interviewed by Joe Rogan at the Ultimate FIghter finale...

Backstage, Lauren interviewed Tara, who bitched about drinking beer before a match. She said she's a professional athlete and shouldn't have to drink before a match, but she'd drink a keg to get her hands on ODB... [C]

Powell's POV: Giving control of the show to Nash this week gave Vinny Ru the storyline excuse he apparently felt he needed to bring back the worst of Crash TV. This is just skit-happy garbage so far. Very disappointing.

Backstage, Hemme interviewed Young about his intergender match against Hamada. Young said he wouldn't defend the belt on American soil for any commissioner. He said he's breaking his rule and defending the belt on American soil for his buddy Nash. Young said he wants Hamada to pull out all the stops and do her best to beat him for the Global Title...

Powell's POV: So they changed the name of the little red toy belt only to make it an even bigger joke by allowing Young to decide when and where he defends it. What's the point of keeping this belt around aside from the fact that no one wants to tell Dixie she wasted thousands of dollars on a belt they can't get over? I'd pay money to have Young jump to WWE and throw the belt in the trash just so that I never had to see it again.

3. Eric Young pinned Hamada to retain the TNA Global Title in 1:45. Hamada got a nice flurry of offense early. Young caught her with a boot. Taz thought it was over, but Hamada came right back with a top rope huracanrana. She went for a moonsault, but Young rolled out of the way. Young used the ropes for leverage while pinning her...

Powell's POV: The match fun while it lasted. Young is fine when he's used as a mid-card player and not shoved down the throats of viewers as a faction leader.

[Q5] Backstage, the Beautiful People discussed their match. They teased having a straight up match with no gimmicks and then laughed. Velvet and Lacey teased that they had hot outfits under the robes by turning their backs to the camera and showing them off to each other. They teased a three-way kiss to show how to get ratings...

A video aired with Mick Foley in his car in Hendersonville, Tenn. looking for jarrett. He went to a place called Barefoot Charlie's. He asked the bartender for directions. As he was leaving, a voice called out, "You looking for somebody." Foley turned back and found a scruffy looking Jarrett, who was wearing a hat and had grown a beer... [C]

Powell's POV: Jarrett is a lush loser! Okay, that was a nice tease for later in the show. By the way, the cut-in showed ODB slamming drinks and pounding on her own tits. Maybe she's the true inspiration for Hornswoggle.

Backstage, Christy interviewed ODB, who was acting drunk. She said her match was essentially a "business as usual match" for her. Nice line...

4. ODB beat Tara in a non-title Trailer Park Throwdown match in 5:10. The announcers noted that Tara isn't much of a drinker and she made faces as she swigged a beer on her way to the ring. Tara teased getting sick in a bucket, only to use it as a weapon. She also used a kendo stick on ODB and then shoved her into a wheelbarrow that tipped over.

ODB came back by spitting beer in Tara's face. ODB rolled her back in the ring as the fans had dueling chants for the two women. ODB catapulted Tara into a ladder that was set up in the corner. Later, Tara was in control of the match when she tried to climb the top rope only to fall down. ODB used a DDT on a chair to get the win...

Powell's POV: Wait, didn't Tara just say she left WWE because she was tired of being humiliated? Bring back the X Division where the focus is on in-ring talent. This is just overbooked ratings stunt.

At the bar, Foley asked Jarrett where he's been and told him looked like hell. Jarrett said he's been living in hell. Foley said Double J can't stay away from wrestling. Jarrett said Double J probably can't stay away from pro wrestling, but Jeff Jarrett can. "Are you kidding me," Jarrett asked. "After what she's done to me? Are you kidding me, Mick"...

Powell's POV: Another quality clip that leaves viewers waiting for more details from Jarrett. By the way, Hendersonville is actually Orlando.

[Q6] [C] Tenay announced that Spike TV would not allow them to air the shocking footage of Abyss, but it will be available on the TNA website immediately following the show...

Powell's POV: I don't know what the footage will be, but I like the attempt to drive traffic to their website.

Team 3D, Rhino, and Jesse Neal came to the ring. Brother Ray said their match would be a handicap match because The Pope was unable to wrestle. Neal was wearing Pope's jacket. The babyface opponents made their entrance... [C]

5. Team 3D, Rhino, and Jesse Neal defeated Matt Morgan, Hernandez, and Suicide in 7:05. Lots of squeals from the big group of young women when Morgan pulled his elbow pad off early. He's so dreamy! Er, um, Tenay ran through the stipulation that the loser of the match will have to fly solo for five minutes to start the eight-man tag match at the pay-per-view.

[Q7] Late in the match, there was a series where the wrestlers took turns hitting finishers or big moves. Morgan hit the Border Toss on Devon, but Neal gored him and got the pin for his team. The heels continued to attack the babyfaces after the match, but Dinero's music played. He limped to the ring with a taped knee and a cane. The heels scattered...

Powell's POV: Please tell me the big swerve isn't going to be that Pope faked an injury and is working with the heels. Hernandez will have to open the eight-man tag match at the pay-per-view working against all four heels for five minutes and then the rest of his team will be able to join the match if he survives. Here's hoping they can make up for how bad they've made him look lately by having him shine during those five minutes. I'm still stunned that Hernandez and Morgan are on the short list of guys the company wants to push, yet they continue to be wasted in a program that seems designed to get Neal over.

A Tomko training video aired and concluded with a graphic that read, "Tomko is back"...

At ringside, Tenay and Taz were wearing rain coats. Taz had goggles on. They simultaneously opened umbrellas since the mud it was right next to them. Taz joked that he's called a lot of matches, but he's never had to use an umbrella. The ultra-hip Tenay actually made a Gallagher reference. For those under the age of 40, he's a comedian who used to smash watermelons with sledgehammers. Yes, it's true, Triple H stole the sledgehammer gimmick!

6. Velvet Sky pinned Lacey Von Erich in a mud wrestling match in 1:20. Madison Rain is the special ref. The trio came to the ring together and entered the mud pit together. Velvet pinned Lacey and they all celebrated together afterward and engaged in a big three-way hug...

Powell's POV: Taz noted that the mud was "really wet." Yes, it's true, TNA somehow managed to fuck up mud.

Backstage, Jay Lethal was in Black Machismo mode. He plugged his next match against a legend for next week. He said he won't stop until he's in the ring with Hulk Hogan and can rewrite the history books...

A shot aired of A.J. Styles walking backstage. Tenay reminded viewers that he'll defend the title against the highest bidder... [C]

Powell's POV: Despite all the goddamn pre-tapes on this show, they couldn't find time to properly promote a TNA Title match or the highest bidder gimmick? Seriously, they've focussed on everything but their champion and his belt.

The cut-in segment featured Kevin Nash informing the ring announcer who the highest bidder was. Tenay said we'll find out after the break...

[Q8] They cut back to the footage of Foley and Jarrett at the bar. Jarrett griped about starting TNA with his blood, sweat, and money. He said it was all thrown aside. Foley said he brought it on himself. Jarrett said the punishment didn't fit the crime. Foley told him he was drowning his sorrows while someone else was raising his two little girls. "It's three," Jarrett responded. "Sit down, Mick, we need to talk"...

A.J. Styles is also dreamy based on the reaction of the young women in the crowd. There's a group of about 50 young ladies at the show. Rumor has it that is 44 more females than ROH has drawn to date. Desmond Wolfe was apparently the highest bidder because he was introduced as the challenger...

Powell's POV: They're really giving their first TNA match away on television with zero buildup or hype? Stay hot, Vinny Ru!

7. A.J. Styles pinned Desmond Wolfe to retain the TNA Title in 4:45. Kurt Angle sat in on commentary. Late in the match, Daniels walked to ringside, which distracted Wolfe. Styles took advantage of the distraction by rolling up Styles for the win.

Afterward, Styles headed up the ramp. Desmond approached Daniels at ringside and they bickered. They ended up trading forearm shots while Styles watched from the stage. A group of referees stepped between them. Tenay told viewers to stick around for the conclusion of the Foley and Jarrett video... [C]

Back at the bar, Jarrett told Foley it's been five months since he spoke Dixie. Foley said that's exactly how much time was necessary for healing to begin. "What about Kurt," Jarrett asked. Foley said they'd cross that bridge when they got to it. Foley said Dixie knows there wouldn't be a TNA without Jarrett. Foley suggested that Jarrett show up at the Impact Zone with his head held high. "Let's do this," Jarrett said before shaking Foley's hand to close the show...

Powell's POV: Nice tease for next week. As campy as the Foley videos started out, the footage of him and Jarrett talking was more intriguing than anything else that aired on the show. TNA took a big step backward with the bulk of tonight's show. I wonder what Hulk Hogan was thinking as watched this show. Will the image conscious Hogan want to be associated with mud wrestling and drunken Knockout matches? I just don't see how he and Russo can coexist. No, TNA, that doesn't mean I want to see their friction turned into a storyline. Thanks for watching along with me tonight. Check back on Friday for the TNA Impact Hitlist.

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