By Rich Twilling

TNA Impact on Spike TV
Taped in Orlando, Florida

[Q1] Footage of Abyss foreshadowing the formation of 'They' and footage of the main event of Bound for Glory was shown. Tonight's show is entitled, "They Have Arrived!" ...

The show began with Dixie Carter's lawyer arguing with Eric Bischoff over the contract Dixie signed last week. The lawyer said Eric changed the contract. Eric threw the lawyer out of his building and laughed...

Hulk Hogan and Eric Bischoff made their way to the ring. Hogan played his crutch like a guitar. Mike Tenay and Taz checked in on commentary. Tenay said Bischoff now has majority ownership of TNA. Hogan got a babyface pop. That's not good.

Bischoff introduced Hogan officially. Hogan called Dixie Carter "no good" and welcomed everyone to "my company." He said it was time to take what was theirs. He said they tried to do it the easy way, but Dixie did not want to do it the easy way.

He said Dixie promised to give Hogan the keys to the car and let him take TNA to the next level. Hogan said Dixie did not want to do it the easy way. He said the new group is called "Hollywood Hogan's Immortals" and TNA would live forever...

Twill's Two Cents: Hogan and Bischoff should do the mic work for Hardy and the rest of the Immortals.

Bischoff said nobody saw the plan coming. He said it started with Abyss and he brought Abyss out to the ring. Hugs all around. Hogan called Abyss his son. "They're here!!!" exclaimed Abyss. He told everyone to believe that they are in control of TNA. He said he was Hogan and Bischoff's soldier and would destroy anyone who stood in their way.

Hogan said Abyss was immortal and would live forever. Bischoff then introduced Jeff Jarrett. Tenay called Jarrett the biggest disappointment of the group. Jarrett said Dixie took the company from him. She used 'Daddy's money' to run Jarrett out of his office.

Twill's Two Cents: No 'Daddy's money,' no TNA. By the way, our own Jason Powell is discussing the show with Dot Net Members tonight, so head over to the Forum and hang out with him.

Jarrett said it was a pleasure to work with both Bischoff and Hogan. He said everyone will have to play by the new rules of the new regime. Fortune came out to the ring. Flair told Hogan that the company is run by Fortune.

[Q2] Flair said he hated Hogan and Hogan hated him for 25 years and one of them was going to walk away tonight. Hogan challenged Flair. Flair took his jacket off. Hogan and Flair hugged. Fortune and the Immortals celebrated together.

Twill's Two Cents: Well, I have to admit, seeing them all in the same ring together, especially Hogan and Flair, is pretty surreal. Let's hope some babyfaces, which there are plenty of, will step up.

Hogan called Flair the greatest wrestler of all time. Flair said he will get up everyday loving Hogan more than he loved any of his five ex-wives. "Wherever they are, they call kiss my ass. Wooooo!!!" Jeff Hardy was then introduced and he came out to the ring.

The crowd chanted "You sold out!" to Hardy. He said he did not sell out, he sold in. Hardy blamed the crowd for his pain. He blamed the crowd for the pain he put his body through. He said they were immortal and would live forever.

Kevin Nash and Sting were shown watching on a monitor backstage. Hogan invited them out to the ring and said there were two more seats at the table. Nash and Sting stood up and started walking... [C]

Twill's Two Cents: I liked what I saw from Hardy and I like that they didn't expect him to carry the promo. He was short and effective. His facial expressions were dead on and he came across well.

Back from commercial, Dixie Carter was shown being escorted into the building...

Twill's Two Cents: Shouldn't she be banned too?

As Sting and Nash hit the ring, Tenay said Sting and Nash tried to tell everyone what Hogan and Bischoff were up to. "DAMMIT NOBODY WOULD LISTEN!!!" yelled Tenay. Um yeah Tenay, didn't you say you were annoyed by them too?

Bischoff offered a spot for Nash and Sting on the team. Nash said for much of his career, all he cared about was money. He did not care about people starving or losing the roof over their heads. However, Nash has gotten wiser as he has gotten older.

Nash said the guys in the back were his friends. He said he was going to pass up the money this time and if they wanted to run the company into the ground, they could do it without Nash. Sting said he loved TNA. He said he did not give his body for all of this.

[Q3] Sting called this a no-win situation and he was not going to repeat history again. His answer was no. Nash and Sting left the ring. They gave each other the "too sweet" finger high five thingy and walked away as Bischoff berated them on the way out. The new group headed to the back...

Twill's Two Cents: I liked that opening segment. They dedicated a half hour to it, and that made sense given how important it was to the company. Let's just see how this plays out. They have plenty of matchups they can go to here. All around good stuff, frankly. Good start. I realize this is a rehash and it has a shelf life, but I'm into an Impact more than I have been in a long time.

Backstage, Pope wanted to know from Sting and Nash what the hell was going on. He said he was going to fight by himself if he had to...

Dixie was approached by Hogan and Bischoff. Dixie smacked Eric in the face and wanted Hogan to tell her to her face he screwed her. Hogan said they could have the conversation in his office... [C]

Twill's Two Cents: That will teach Dixie to sign something without looking at it first.

Dixie spoke to Hogan and a cigar smoking Bischoff. She asked if Hogan did it on purpose...

Twill's Two Cents: No, he fell ass backwards into it.

Hogan said Dixie would make him happy and she didn't do it. Hogan said Dixie just sat on her computer. She said she never trusted Bischoff. She called him a "slug shit." I think she dropped "shit" on Spike TV.

Hogan kept saying, "This is my company." Dixie told her security guys to get Hogan and Bischoff out of her office. Hogan said they worked for him and had the "piece of trash" removed. Dixie's husband Serg got knocked out with one punch from the security guy... [C]

Twill's Two Cents: Nice work by Dixie here. She is playing the "screwed over, pissed off bitch" pretty well right now. By the way, she should tell Serg to stay away because he always ends up with his face eating the ground.

[Q4] JWOW (I assume that is her) drove up and walked in through the back entrance. Madison Rayne made her entrance with a referee. Boobs McGee said her plan on Sunday was to become the TNA Knockouts Champion for the third time.

She said that didn't happen because Tara won the match. She said Tara had her to thank for having her job back at TNA. She demanded Tara come down to the ring and give her a title match right now.

Madison told Tara they had a deal and told her to do the right thing. She handed the belt to the referee and the match began...

1. Madison Rayne defeated Tara to win the TNA Knockouts Championship in :20. Tara laid down and took the three count...

Twill's Two Cents: Absolute in-ring classic. Backstage, Hogan and Nash are asking, "How stupid was that?"

Madison celebrated for her triumphant victory. Mickie James came out to the stage. Mickie called Madison a disgrace for all past champions. She said she was coming for the belt right now. She came down to the ring and knocked Tara to the floor before running off Madison...

JWOW walked on a Beautiful People makeup session. Lacey was star struck like an idiot. TBP and JWOW agreed to make this Cookie's last night in TNA... [C]

TBP looked around for Cookie. They ran into Eric Young, who was a big fan of JWOW, but he called her "Bow Wow." Orlando Jordan wanted to put his lollipop in JWOW's mouth. She dropped it and stepped on it. They walked away and Jordan yelled, "Jersey Shore sucks." ...

[Q5] Kurt Angle came to the ring without music. He said he wanted to get a few things off of his chest before making his "official statement of retirement." The crowd chanted, "Please don't go!" at Kurt. He appreciated it but said he was a man of his word.

Angle said he dislocated some ribs, injured his neck again, and had stitches in his eye. He demanded answers from Hogan and Bischoff. He said he did not win the title, but he did not "necessarily get pinned either." He said he was in a dilemma.

Jarrett's music hit to absolutely no reaction. Jarrett said Angle's decision should be easy because he lost. He referred to Angle as a father, husband, and then said "ex-husband," of course referring to marrying Angle's ex-wife.

"First of all," said Angle, "You can have that f---ing bitch." He said Jarrett held down everyone in TNA while Angle put TNA on the map. Jarrett said he sold his soul to the devil because taking Angle's career was more important than taking his life.

He said he had already taken everything from Angle and taking his career was the last nail in his coffin. Angle headed out to get Jarrett but was stopped from behind by the security guys. Angle was cuffed. Jarrett then beat on him and rammed him into the side of the stage head first.

Jarrett continued to punch Angle and Taz left the announce table to stand up for Angle. "Get your ass to the back. He's got a fucked up neck." Angle was shown and he was out... [C]

Twill's Two Cents: I like that Angle was sticking to his word, but then he went back on it a little bit. I think the personal stuff between Jarrett and Angle didn't work so well when Jarrett was a babyface, but this could work pretty well. Pretty good segment that will lead to Angle facing Jarrett to come back to the company, I'm guessing.

Footage was shown of what happened right before the break...

Samoa Joe was filmed the day after Bound for Glory saying he made the biggest mistake of his life by trusting Jeff Jarrett. He said Jarrett chose him because he knew Joe would destroy everyone. Now, that same man is looking for Jarrett...

[Q6] 2. Samoa Joe defeated Abyss by disqualification in 2:18. Joe hit the ring and attacked right away. He dominated early, but Abyss then hit a chokeslam out of nowhere. He grabbed a chair. Suicide dive by Joe into the chair and Abyss. Abyss hit Joe with the bell.

Abyss brought Joe back into the ring and further opened him up. Rob Van Dam's music hit and he hit the ring. Abyss and Janice retreated into the crowd. He almost dropped it into the crowd. Lawsuit!

RVD checked on Joe. Joe did not want anyone's help and took off to the back...

Van Dam stayed in the ring and called out Jeff Hardy. He said Jeff owed everyone an explanation. Didn't he give that earlier? He then said they were beyond that.

Hardy cut a weird ass big screen promo. A very cold, creepy Hardy spoke about friendship. He said he was now referred to as the new anti-Christ of professional wrestling. "You want me? They all do." ...

Twill's Two Cents: Creepy. And very good. More of that from Hardy please.

Bischoff came out and booked RVD vs. Mr. Anderson with the winner facing Jeff Hardy for the title at Turning Point. RVD agreed... [C]

Backstage, Bischoff flirted with Miss Tessmacher and invited her to his place. She basically humped him right there. He said she was too easy and almost cost him everything. She needed to keep her mouth shut and her legs closed. He said her only shot at sticking around was in the Knockouts division.

Mr. Anderson came up and shook Bischoff's hand. He did so very forcefully. He said Bischoff was a douchebag and told him he was not going to win the war...

[Q7] 3. Fortune (with Ric Flair and Matt Morgan) defeated D'Angelo Dinero in a handicap match in 3:33. Pope had some success but took a carbon footprint from Morgan on the floor after taking a shot at Flair.

Pope actually almost scored the win after Styles hit the Pele kick on Kazarian. Beer Money hit the DWI on Pope for the win. They attacked him after the bell...

Twill's Two Cents: Fortune needed to cheat to win a five on one match? What the hell was that?

The Shore made their way through the backstage area. TBP and JWOW did the same... [C]

Robbie E. and Cookie came out to the ring. Is this shit over yet? Oh wait, they haven't even grabbed the mic yet. The crowd chanted "Who are you?" at them. Robbie said 'Jersey Shore' was on right now. He said nobody wanted to watch "those fake punks."

[Q8] The crowd chanted "Boring." JWOW came out with TBP. She stepped up to Cookie. "They cannot get face to face because there's no room," said Taz. Nice. Cookie slapped JWOW and JWOW beat the crap out of her. TBP got rid of Robbie E. That was it...

Twill's Two Cents: Well, if they were scrapping the angle, that would have been the way to do it. Not much more else to say as I'm not a fan of that show and definitely not a fan of this act.

Footage of what took place before the break was shown...

Tenay and Taz recapped the events from tonight as they related to Hogan, Flair, and company...

Mr. Anderson was shown stretching backstage. Both Anderson and RVD made their entrances...

[Overrun] 4. Rob Van Dam vs. Mr. Anderson to become the number one contender for the TNA World Heavyweight Championship ended in a no contest in 9:34. ... [C]

They traded right hands. Step through reverse heel kick by RVD. RVD hit a moonsault off of the apron as Impact ended and Reaction began...

TNA Reaction

Anderson took advantage of the match to really slow things down. Comeback by RVD and a split legged moonsault for a two count. Anderson came back and hit the flipping front slam for a two count of his own.

Anderson missed a swanton from the top rope. RVD came back with a five star, but Anderson put his knees up. Bischoff came to the ring and removed referee Brian Hebner from the match. Jeff Hardy came out and attacked both men with a chair.

He put Anderson's arm in a chair and then hit the Twist of Fate on RVD onto the chair and Anderson's arm. Hardy posed in the corner after the match to close out the show...

Twill's Two Cents: Good start of the show with a not so good finish. What we don't need with the "new NWO" is a bunch of non-finishes in main event level matches. The followup to 'They' was pretty well done and I felt Hardy was the key. As long as he cuts dark and eerie promos, he can pass as a heel. We'll see how things follow up because eventually, we will have to see matches and programs.

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